Bitches with Black Hair and Glasses Convention, Summer 2012

Bitches with Black Hair and Glasses

Official Logo For the Summer 2012 Convention

July 13-15, 2012 was the first Bitches with Black Hair and Glasses convention. Attendees were Amy, Yvonne, Myself, and Dani. It took place in Los Angeles, CA.

Among us there are: 1 college professor, 3 librarians, 1 Nurse, 3 Sex Educators, 2 Prospect Researchers, 4 Bitches.

I was actually unavailable on Friday the 13th, so I didn’t join in on festivities until Saturday. We had t-shirts (red) made with the above logo. We met up for breakfast at Russell’s in Pasadena where we started off the day with delicious food and breakfasty booze: blood orange mimosas and bellini. Then we were off to do some shopping on Melrose Avenue. Most of the day went like this: Shop, stop for booze, shop, stop for booze, shop, stop for booze and food, shop.

We were not prepared for people to stop us and ask us where we are from or what group we’re with, etc., seeing as we were all wearing the same shirt. We were asked if it was our band, or our salon, or some kind of club. I think we finally settled on, “We’re an intellectual group.”

We tried and tried to go to Library Bar, but it was never open when we wanted to go. We stopped by Frederick’s of Hollywood on Hollywood Blvd because you know, why not, then we made our way over to Red Lion Tavern for food and booze. THIS PLACE IS AWESOME. We squeezed into a far-too-small booth on the first floor. At a table next to us were a man and his wife. The man kept giving us a look, a look that said, “I certainly wish I were at your table, laughing with you adorable ladies, instead of here with my harpy wife.” We ended up talking to the man when his wife left to use the restroom. He said he wants to join our group. He wants to be a bitch with black hair and glasses. He left his glasses at home, he said, but if he lets his hair grow out, he’ll have a Jew-fro.

It was here at the Red Lion Tavern that Yvonne and I ordered a life-changing dish:

Here, allow me to give you a close-up:

This, my friends, is Beerstein Soup. It is a beerstein full of split pea soup and then a wiener is stuck in it. The presentation alone blew my mind. I have never imagined something so amazing. Also, it was delicious.

Afterward, we wandered across to Cha Cha Lounge, which was unfortunately a hipster bar full of hipsters and music so loud I couldn’t hear myself drink. So we sat under a velvet painting of a unicorn, had one drink each, and left to find a tiki bar.

FWIW, the unicorn was pretty awesome.

We went to Tiki Ti, which came recommended to us as the quintessential tiki bar in l.a. It’s one of the last bars in California that one can smoke in and people were definitely taking their liberties so we only stopped there to use the water closet and went down the street to Akbar, all the while I’m yelling, “IT’S A TWAP! IT’S A TWAAAAPPP!!!!” because hey, by this point, I’d had some booze. We ended up staying there a couple hours, chatting with some delightful men. Akbar, we found, is a gay bar and there were a wide range of gays. It was a wonderful place. Low-key, lots of seating.

Thus ended Saturday. Oh, and there was this:

Yes, it says “Check Your Wiener.”

Sunday we met out in Santa Monica at the Third Street Promenade, which was fairly uneventful, as it tends to be. We then went to The Museum of Death in Hollywood. It’s definitely not for the weak. It was alright, though, some images I’ve seen better versions on the internet. Also, I had hoped that there would be more intellectual discussion on death and dying when really, everything was basically for shock value. It was more like the Museum of Horrible Things Human Beings are Capable of Doing to Other Humans. I’m glad I’ve gone once, but I don’t have any reason to go back. The taxidermy freaky animals AND the LIVE Siamese turtle were definitely highlights.

We made our way out to North Hollywood to Tonga Hut Tiki Lounge because we were determined to get our tiki on. This place was WONDERFUL! We went up to the bar and said, “We want Mai Tais” to which the bartender replied, “Regular, Passion, or Spicy?” Well excuse the hell out of me! I never imagined getting choices! Full bar and long menu of tiki drinks. They know their shit. Yes, it’s in the middle of nowhere, but totally worth it.

We went to Gyu-Kaku for dinner and managed to not burn ourselves while cooking our own food. We even managed to get a group picture:

Overall, this conference was a huge success. We’ve already brainstormed ideas for the logo for next conference and once we figure out when that is, I may even get a website up for it. Maybe. And maybe you could buy your own shirts and collectibles.

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  1. I’ll totally wear a wig and glasses to sneak in to the next one!

  1. July 25, 2013

    […] was actually posted on a member’s blog last year so look at it here. Don’t make me repeat myself. I hate repeating […]

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