What is Inspiring Me

Last night on Twitter, my friend asked:

I responded:

I was thinking about it today and I wanted to write more in response, so here I am.

The thing about inspiration, for me and many people, is that it is not necessarily consistent. So at any given time, I just kinda throw any combination of the things below at the wall and see what sticks.

  1. There is my answer in the Tweet above, of course. I’m feeling a bit powerless with certain things in my life right now but it is always within my power to write, so I am. I am trying to simultaneously write my way out of a situation and into a better one.
  2. My depression and OCD inspire me. Even with medication, I have not felt in control of most of my emotions for years. Ever? The meds will do a bit of numbing so I feel like I have to fight to have emotions. I know I can illicit things from others such as laughter, love, amusement, sadness, and heartache from my writing and singing. So I work on creating to illicit emotions from other in hopes that it inspires me, too, to feel some feelings.
  3. Reading shitty writing inspires me, especially if it’s writing that the author probably got paid for. It builds my confidence.
  4. Reading the kind of writing that I want to be doing inspires me as well.
  5. My friends and family inspire me. Sometimes I do things for the sole reason of making a certain one of my friends laugh. I often deliberately do things that will make my spouse cry tears of joy.
  6. Writing snail mail is perhaps my biggest consistent inspiration. I am writing, by hand, for an audience of one. I take no photographs nor make any copies of what I send. I often forget what I have said from one letter to the next. In each letter or parcel, I’m offering a snapshot of what is going on with me during a single moment in time and only the person receiving it is privy to this. I am inspired by the intimacy of it, the feeling of weight lifting by writing something by hand then sending it off into the world, and the joy I know that will be felt at the receiving end, where anyone is happy to receive mail that is not a bill.

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